Tuesday, November 30, 2004
[[distance of love.. - 29.11.04]]
Most of the times.. I am left wondering.. I am left guessing.. I am left clueless.. I am left all confused.. Did I asked for all these..? I believed not.. All I wanted was a simple love.. Yet.. in return.. it was so full of anguish emotions..
The process tt I thought so to enjoy.. I tried to seek for an outcome.. Fearing of an outcome which seals the final fate.. I chose to disguise.. The question I thought I would ask.. Instead.. I chose silent..
I forced a knife deep into my own heart.. It just hurts.. So I plunged it deeper.. Hoping tt it will end someday.. somehow.. I've tried.. And I've failed.. Hmm.. I wun sae tt I have failed.. Itz juz tt probably.. I am taking a breather..
Hmm.. You dun want others to take you for granted.. Aren't you doing the same to me..?
I am too far away from the surface of the water.. I cant come up for a breather.. I am seeking a solution.. An alternative.. Please.. let me be in peace..
/my heart.. it stopped..
emotionally charged.-evewbb 1:33 AM
Sunday, November 21, 2004
[[sorry.. - 20.11.04]]
"I tht you will do anything for me.." the words just echoed..
Promises made and broken once again.. by myself..
Insensitive and unthoughtful were the words being used.. Add a dash of selfishness.. VOILA.. ttz ME.. yup.. Indeed I was being insensitive to your needs and not considerate towards your feelings.. I did not asked for your opinion.. It was a mistake from the start..
"You ruined my life.." the words stabbed thru my heart the second time..
Indeed.. Everything I do.. seems to ruin your life.. Out of your life totally.. Perhaps.. ttz the only way ur life wun be ruined..
LAST WORDS: I'm sorry for the 101th time..
emotionally charged.-evewbb 1:04 PM
Sunday, November 14, 2004
[[sassy girl alert!! - 13.11.04]]
Hmm.. One of my sec friend turned 21 again.. Hmm.. As the age increases.. I will just dread gg to such 'parties'.. Hmm.. Aging process.. Hmm.. Probably..
As usual.. Left halfway thru the party.. Well.. Itz expected.. Lolx..
Went to lil princess's place to pick her up.. Was supposed to study at my house.. Hmm.. Perhaps she did study.. -shrugs-.. I have not touched books.. since last year..
Well.. Made her upset again.. And she showed her 'My Sassy Girl' power.. Hmm.. She's just like the actress in the movie.. She packs powerful punches.. -siGh-.. Hmm.. She wields a big appetite too.. She ate up half a packet of 300g famous amos no nut choco chip cookies.. Lolx.. But she is still as good-looking as ever.. =)
Finally.. at 2330hrs.. We walked to YCK to eat prata.. She had plain prata while I had egg prata.. Hmm.. She wanted to eat chicken wing.. So we walked in the chomp chomp to buy and send her home after tt..
Hmm.. No matter what you do.. I still like you alot.. Hmm.. Yup!
/fatal stab..
emotionally charged.-evewbb 11:12 PM
Thursday, November 11, 2004
[[muffins - 09.11.04]]
Hmm.. Lil Princess finally got down to work on tues.. and baked muffins.. blueberry muffins to be specific.. ttz what she claims tt to be.. (secretly.. i think itz burnt muffins..) but.. still have to eat.. coz..
Hmm.. Have been gg dwn to lil princess's area 3 days in a row..
Hmm.. Monday - Dinner
Hmm.. Tuesday - Dinner @chomp chomp and later to meet her best fren
Hmm.. Wednesday - To send her food.. coz she's cooped up at hm.. supposedly to study.. -siGh-
Hmm.. Made her upset again.. Have to make amendments.. She claims I slammed dwn the phone on her.. So have to go buy food for her to eat..
Hmm.. And I bought banana cake.. Hmm.. so delicious.. Hmm.. But I still prefer her blueberry muffins lah.. Hmm.. Lolx..
Hmm.. Got bullied again.. -siGh-
- I got locked outside of her house balcony
- My leg knocked against the piano chair
- My elbow knocked against her main door
- My head knocked against her head
- I got pinched..
- Got pushed onto the stairs..
/A story I have not composed.. A you I have not known..
emotionally charged.-evewbb 1:35 PM
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
[[i wish.. - 02.11.04]]
Hmm.. I wish upon a star..
A question.. An answer
A lock.. A key..
A you.. A me..
A question I wish I could ask..
An answer I wish you could answer..
A lock I wish I could open..
A key I wish I could unlock..
A you.. I wish I can be with..
A me.. I wish to have more initiative..
/juz for u..
emotionally charged.-evewbb 1:56 PM
Monday, November 01, 2004
[[perhaps.. - 01.11.04]]
Hmm.. Some thoughts for the first of the month.. Have I moved on to the next chapter or have I re-traced back to the previous chapters..?
I walked into a garden.. Anticipated various types of flowers.. One caught my attention and heart.. It was the sunflower.. Just coz it was so bright.. It seemed to add some colors in my life.. A rainbow life it started.. I visited the garden everytime my heart stirred.. For it was the sunflower which brought the rainbow.. The sunflower was exceptionally beautiful.. Esp on a sunny morning.. Gradually.. I found out tt.. As night slowly approaches.. The sunflower loses its shine.. Perhaps without the sun.. It fell asleep.. But it did not realised tt I was paying attention to it all this while.. My life revolves around a sunflower who tht I did not bother.. It tht tt I did not care.. It tht tt I was never serious.. It tht tt liking her was just a norm..
One day.. The sunflower wilted and died.. Upset as I was.. I mourned for 'her' death..
Numerous times.. I stepped into the garden.. I tht i saw the sunflower at exactly the same spot.. I didnt.. I did not see it.. I visualised it..
The sunflower which once stirred my heart.. In itz place.. Grew lilies.. I felt it has the charm of the sunflower.. I fell deeply in love with it.. I still am..
/all abt feelins..
emotionally charged.-evewbb 6:38 PM
